goa ki leela

we’re in goa! since the fifth month is relatively a quiet and comfortable time, we decided to plan a last vacation before we got into the hectic and demanding times ahead. naturally, i can’t do anything really rigorous right now – nor is it safe to – and we managed to get some really great off-season rates at the Leela, so here we are!

DAY 1: Saturday, 19th September 2009

the difference starts as soon as you get off your flight, when two attendants are waiting for you outside with a luxurious Nissan x-trail SUV with leather upholstery. we literally could not stop smiling. the property is way out in the middle of nowhere, so it takes nearly an hour to get there from the airport, in spite of the expert fast driving.

the first view of the Leela is deceptive – we didn’t feel as though we were entering a luxury resort, but rather as if it were some low-cost government guesthouse, because everything is painted a rather strange pinkish colour. of course, as soon as you enter the lobby, everything changes. we were greeted with genda maalas (like phoreners! bhelcome to india saar!) and daab as we sat comfortably while the concierge checked us in and dealt with the teeny tiny matter of x-raying our luggage for security reasons. we were then shown around the place. the entire property is spread out in cottages, interspersed with landscaping, restaurants, club, spa, golf course, tennis court, swimming pool, lagoon backwater and private beach. water sports are organized on the lagoon (the sea is too choppy right now). it’s quite pretty!

we have a lagoon-facing suite which is said to be decorated in the portuguese style, but it’s all fairly generic hotel furniture except shuttered sliding doors covering the windows and the doors onto the balconies instead of curtains. the bedroom and bathrooms (they have two! in one suite!) are fairly luxurious, as expected, with a soft bed and comforter and lovely marble bath and shower set up in both bathrooms. we were expecting four-poster beds and dark wood appointments, maybe some tile or chip decorations etc, anything to make it seem more portuguese, but that hasn’t happened. the prices of food and other necessities make your hair turn white, but i guess that’s to be expected. prepare to pay up to half the cost of your entire stay just to keep away hunger! :)

we had planned some sightseeing but we’re dealing with some limitations. my husband’s knee got twisted somehow yesterday, and he’s limping. this is a recurrent problem (old injury – ligament tear), so we are dealing with it, but it does mean that long walks are out. we can’t drink (well, i can’t hehe), we can’t do bumpy water sports, the sea is too choppy to enter, and we can’t even go on long drives if they last more than one hour, cos i need rest-stops constantly! so where does that leave us? to enjoy our suite and maybe take short walks around the property. we’ll see how it goes, maybe try and catch a city tour on monday. anyway, we’ve both been here before and we will come again in the future, so there’s no real anxiety to go out and see everything – which was really one of the reasons we chose this place, because we knew my limitations.

hehe but it really is a small world! we were being driven to our cottage in a golf cart (which in the Leela means a full-fledged six seater buggy with comfortable upholstery) and saw one of my husband’s college classmates coming from the opposite direction in another buggy with his significant other! unfortunately the buggies crossed each other so fast, we didn’t get a chance to do more than just wave.

DAY 2: Sunday, 20th September 2009

today was such a lovely, lazy day! we stayed mostly indoors, because first it was way too muggy and hot to step out (just the walk to the lunch venue had me sweating and gasping), and then it started raining in the evening just as we stepped out to go for a walk. so we only went out for lunch, which was excellent! they had set up a lunch buffet which was very elaborate and, by leela standards, surprisingly economical! we picked up a dvd to watch from the main desk, sat outside in the balcony chatting for a while and then ordered in dinner (an excellent chicken biryani). all in all, a nice day. i’m so glad there’s no pressure to go sightseeing, because with all this rest, hubby’s knee is recovering nicely and i’m really enjoying having him to myself for so much time!

tomorrow we might check out the water sports, swim a little in the pool and take a walk by the beach, whatever’s possible, and if we feel so inclined. hehe what a holiday! :)

DAY 3: Monday, 21st September 2009

today we got up with a mission – we had to leave the suite! :) so by lunchtime, groaning and complaining, somehow we were ready to go! after the elaborate lunch buffet (and a really disappointing chicken stuffed with ricotta and spinach for me), we felt so sleepy that all i wanted to do was go back and sleep. but the weather suddenly turned really nice, and we went for our walk on the beach after all. it was amazing! the minute the sea air hits you, there’s something so invigorating about it that you wake right up and want to run into the waves. i love the sea! pity it wasn’t safe to go in – everyday there were reports in the newspaper about tourists being swept out by currents and having to be rescued, and even a couple of fatalities, so we weren’t about to risk it. just getting our feet wet as we walked was more than enough, even though many people were in up to their necks.

from the beach we took the buggy to the riverside where water sports were organized, but didn’t end up doing any because the only one we could have done was a cruise on the river, and there wasn’t much of a view of anything as far as we could see. in fact, it was quite commercialized with all kinds of shanties on the sides, so a cruise would have been quite pointless. the buggy guy then took us for a drive around the property, and that was quite nice. there was a botanical garden, club suites with their own pools and all kinds of luxuries. we got dropped off at our suite because even though the pool was inviting, it had started to drizzle. the sea air had really got us hungry, so we changed and went off to dinner. unfortunately, by this time we were so overloaded on good food that we really couldn’t do the buffet justice, though that didn’t stop me from filling up my dessert plate! :)

after dinner we thought about going for another walk, but the property is kept quite dark at night, and there wasn’t much to see. so back to the suite and some together time.

DAY 4: Tuesday, 22nd September 2009

The days have flown by so fast! We can’t believe it’s time to pack up and check out! We finally woke up in time for breakfast! After the somewhat disappointing meal, we got ready and packed, and checked out by noon. We still had 3 hours to kill before leaving for the airport, so we played some TT, carrom and pool, which was such good fun that we didn’t even realize how the time flew! We were both quite stuffed from our breakfast, so we shared a quick sandwich. the maitre d’ offered us some complimentary dessert from the buffet as it was our last day – to take some sweet memories with us, he said (so adorable!) – and we really had a blast because they were the best array we’d seen in the past four days! after that it was finally time to regretfully bid this idyll adieu. it had been a lovely, relaxing vacation! just what we wanted!

section 377: homosexuality - the new sin?

the famous section 377 of the Indian Penal Code was much in news recently when a Delhi High Court division bench took matters into its hands and re-interpreted a century-old law. kudos! not so heartening was the reaction of the people, as reported.
i'm not even going to get into the debate about whether or not homosexuality is morally or ethically "right", because i feel there can be no meeting ground between people who think it's a perversion of nature and those who believe it's as natural as heterosexuality and deserves the same respect.
what i want to talk about today is the legal position. it is quite obvious to any homosexual person that gay marriage is not permitted in India. heck, it's still amazing that inter-religious marriage is allowed! but until recently, homosexuality was actually a crime under the Indian Penal Code, punishable by imprisonment for life or ten years and a fine!
this is how the section reads:
"377. Unnatural offences: Whoever voluntarily has carnal intercourse against the order of nature with any man, woman or animal, shall be punished with imprisonment for life, or with imprisonment of either description for term which may extend to ten years, and shall also be liable to fine. Explanation: Penetration is sufficient to constitute the carnal intercourse necessary to the offense described in this section."
a simple reading throws up the following observations:

• this section can only be used against men i.e. lesbianism is not targeted as there is no penetration involved.
• the section does not reveal its intention or the acts it means to prohibit, but in fact uses the very vague wording "against the order of nature". in my view, the section was intended against the biblical sins of sodomy and bestiality, not homosexuality at all. no prohibition of homosexuality would have targeted only male homosexuality and ignored the female, no matter how unacknowledged and under the covers (hehe) such acts may be in society.
• the punishment is severe indeed for what is essentially a private act.

the Delhi High Court judgement in the Naz Foundation PIL has attempted to modernize this archaic law by stipulating the following condition on the implementation of this section: the intercourse should be non-consensual, or with a minor or animal i.e. intercourse between consenting adults cannot be charged under this section. according to the court, any other interpretation would violate the spirit of articles 14, 15, 19 and 21 of the Indian constitution, dealing with equality, discrimination and freedom of life and liberty. thus, homosexual intercourse between consenting adults is finally decriminalized. a small step for two judges, a significant leap for the Indian society.
the judgement, though laudable, can only do so much. firstly, it is only binding on district courts and any smaller bench of the Delhi High Court. to become the law of the land, it needs to be ratified either by the Supreme Court in the form of a judgement, or by the legislature in the form of an amendment of the act itself. secondly, it does not legalize gay marriage. it only decriminalizes homosexuality. it's a step, but a small step. the court appeals to the legislature to come up with a comprehensive law to deal with the issue, as clearly a judgement on section 377 cannot talk about gay marriage. the legislature, however, seems to be content with this limited re-interpretation by the judiciary, and does not seem to have yet formulated any clear policies, let alone any bills, on the matter. gay marriage remains a vexed issue.
well, that's all i had to say about that. it seems to me that society is very unfair to homosexuals, treating it as an offence against nature and a perversion as heinous as sex with a child or an animal. from what i can see, it takes abnormal courage to go against all established norms and take the path less traveled. it's confusing enough to try and figure out your sexual orientation when every societal and parental force is pushing you in one direction, and on top of that to be treated as if there were any choice in the matter is just absurd! it may be a choice for some people, but for many it is just who they were born to be, and to be punished and shunned by society for something that may just be genetic is criminal!!! after all, it's not a teenage rebellion aimed at hurting authority figures, it's a life-altering, painful, difficult decision to make, and deserves all our support! society waxes so eloquent on love - love is blind, love cannot be controlled, predicted or decided, "pyaar kiya nahi jaata ho jaata hai" etc etc. then why can't it see that when a girl falls in love with a girl or a boy with a boy, they are equally helpless in the matter? it's not just a physical act!
i agree, i haven't had to deal with this decision personally, or in any close family member, so maybe i don't know how the parents feel. but seriously parents, get over yourselves and see what your child is going through! i pray that if my time comes, god gives me the strength and vision to be able to support my child through such tough times!

the digital age robber

did anybody catch this article in TOI? freaky! apparently, robbers are now tracking you on twitter to find out when you go on a vacation or weekend away, so they can come take your stuff away! this happens because we allow strangers all too easily to track us on social networking websites, especially twitter. the survey sent out a 100 test friend requests on facebook and twitter, and 13% were accepted on facebook and 93% on twitter! and it's especially the younger users who give away such information, such as children or teenagers in your household. my god, it really gives you to think before you tweet away about your dream vacation!

dell sucks

it's been barely three months, and already the right click key on the touchpad doesn't press down properly. and according to dell, that's not a manufacturing defect but rather wear and tear, which is not covered by warranty. so according to dell, their computers are only built to last three months or less, after which if anything goes wrong, it must be you! this sucks! now to get it fixed i either have to pay Rs.8500 for a full warranty or Rs.1500+spare parts charge for a technician visit. all for a spring that probably costs ten rupees! and all this after spending rs.45000 just three months ago to get this laptop in the first place! :( dissatisfaction factor has never been higher!

I’m a stay-at-home non-mom

it’s tough to stay at home in india. all the time that i was in oslo, i knew there was no other option, so i bided my time and had fun too. but now i’m in the waiting mode, waiting for the phone to ring with an interview call, waiting to get back in the game, and that’s tough. recession sucks! and long break sucks! and daytime tv sucks! and i can’t even justify staying at home by saying it’s for the children, because i have none! :)

Mac Vs PC

as is evident, i waited a long time to buy this laptop, and one of the biggest uncertainties was whether to go the Mac or the Windows way. there were so many arguments pro and against each. and frankly, until u’ve tried a mac, how do u even know what u might be missing? i was sorely tempted for a long time to spend the extra bucks. but as time passed, and i got the chance to try my hand at a few mac notebooks, i realized how much easier it is to stick with what u’ve spent ten years getting to know and perfect. windows might be irritating sometimes but it is familiar and i know how to fix stuff and where to find stuff and generally to be able to accomplish all the major tasks i need my laptop to perform. buying a mac would have taken me back to the bottom of the learning curve. i’m not sure if i’m ready for that and whether the gains will indeed be worth it. be that as it may, i decided to shelve the issue till some benevolent employer decides to gift me a mac, and went for a windows laptop myself. and with the latest windows software, i must say there are many pleasant surprises and complete user satisfaction.

home, sweet home

i guess i never really knew how to feel about returning home. a part of me was expecting to find it v different after the experience of living abroad, but frankly, i didn’t. i settled right back in like a fish in water. and i love being back. in fact, even tho i went half-way across the world to one of the coldest countries in the world, it didn’t feel like it was any different from my own country! apart from the weather, of course. superficially of course there were differences, but fundamentally it was almost as easy to settle in there as it was here. but our level of engagement in oslo life was almost nil, and we kept feeling like outsiders just biding our time before we went home. so i guess it’s not surprising that i’m feeling so glad to be back home. now we can continue with our life where we left off instead of living in limbo just waiting to go home.

loving the windows live writer for my blog! i’ve literally never posted this much! so convenient.

more on my laptop

first of all, thanks inkspill for, in a way, facilitating the purchase of this laptop. if it weren’t for u, i’d probably have held out a lot longer before buying this super-cool machine.

it’s a dell studio 14, and i must say, the post-purchase satisfaction is tremendous! not only is it sleek and stylish, it’s fast, intelligent and in many tiny ways just a delight to work with. we didn’t go far out of the box in terms of configuration, which was pretty great to begin with. it does become pricey if you throw in MS office and antivirus subscriptions, but still nowhere as expensive as apple, which was the only other serious contender. i was v keen on apple for a long time, but two factors held me back from taking the plunge: 1. price, and 2. compatibility issues with various services. it might be a super-intelligent machine to work with, but until it can satisfy me on both these issues, i ain’t jumpin’ into the deep end. and that’s all i’m gonna say about that.

My very own laptop!!!

it may seem ridiculous to be so excited about getting a laptop, but i’ve waited so long and saved so hard for it that it really, really means a lot! :) having so much fun customizing it! :)

i'm going back home!!!!!!!!!!!!!

finally the time has come to bid oslo adieu! it has been a fun year and half, oslo, thanks for that, but you cannot believe how ecstatic i am to go back home! it would have been nicer, maybe, if i could have worked here. or if i could have had family close by. but i made some nice friends, had a great time traipsing around europe a bit, and generally got to live somewhere outside india with minimal fuss. oslo is a peaceful, uncrowded town with wonderfully polite people. we've genuinely not come by such good manners and such nice smiles anywhere else in europe. it's clean and beautiful too, especially in summer. but gimme hot sun any day! and to think i always thought of myself as a winter person till i came here! i guess it's difficult for indian people to adjust to the long, cold, dark winter months, and to think it's a hot day if it's 17 degrees C!
and so it's back to the mad rush and struggle of life that is india - yeh jo des hai mera! :)

pink chaddis zindabad!!!

hahahahahahaha i can literally not stop laughing! finally a movement i can relate to! maybe some of you know, maybe you don't, but every year on valentine's day the religious fundamentalist groups (all hindus, mind you) get up to condemn the celebrations in their own peculiar ways. there have been face blackenings, reports to parents, arrests, parading the guilty parties, even violence! this year the sri ram sena in bangalore visited pubs and slapped all the women there for being loose! and they are going to catch valentine's day-celebrating couples and forcibly marry them off. why, you ask? because celebration of teenage love is against indian culture, if you please. wait, you haven't heard the best part yet! so what did the loose, pub-going, forward women do??? they formed a consortium to collect pink underwear and send it the sri ram sena chief as a valentine's day gift!!!!!!!!!! this is the best idea EVER! i've heard protests and complaints before, but i've literally never been more thrilled with retaliation to blind, cow-minded, 12th century fundamentalism.

you can also be a part of this - just visit their website for more information.

25 random things about me

i got tagged with this me-me on facebook, and since i put in so much time and effort and soul-searching in it, i thought i might as well make it permanent and put it on my blog. :) so here goes:

I've been tagged with this twice now - I tried to hide from the first one, but the second one... well, I give in.

1. I'm scared by this. Blank pages scare me, make my mind go blank.

2. I hate capitalizing alphabets. this is how i prefer to type. :) i love typing. my speed is nearly 84 wpm with 100% accuracy.

3. i've written a diary since i was 12 years old. now it's a blog. i don't write very often. unfortunately i seem to write only when i'm upset and need catharsis, so my diary only contains unhappy moments. i rarely re-read it.

4. i love my family. when people complain about their parents, it upsets me to the point of outburst against them, even though i get irritated with my family too from time to time. i've lost friends because of this.

5. i don't know how to deal with death. my mind goes numb and i don't know what to say or do. i've lost friends because of this too.

6. i have few close friends, but they mean the world to me and i wouldn't know how to get on without them.

7. i was the happy recipient of an amazing good fortune, which i don't think i did anything to deserve - i met my husband when we were both young children, and yet we managed to fall in love and get married as adults. he is the best thing that ever happened to me.

8. i save everything, from movie ticket stubs (the special ones) to old bills to every card or letter i've ever received. it's only when i run out of space in my home (and my parents' home, and my inlaws' home) that i actually throw anything away.

9. i love it when people remember my birthday. and secretly get upset if they don't.

10. i can't remember birthdays so i have a reminder for every single birthday of every single acquaintance on google calendar. now it's slowly growing to include anniversaries and kids' birthdays as well! it's a work in progress.

11. i am hyper-organized. i don't remember anything so i make lists for everything. i hate forgetting things behind when i'm traveling. i don't like things to be out of their place. my husband's teasing keeps me human, or i could easily become a cleaning control freak.

oh man, 25 things is a LOT of things!!!

12. i love working. i need the mental stimulation. balancing my family's needs with my work is one of the most difficult decisions of my life. i continue to have angst about whether i'll regret this 25 years down the line, when i look back on my life.

13. i love reading. anything and everything, it used to be, but now i screen a bit based on past experiences. also, reading on the comp is slowly taking over from reading actual books but i still cannot read a whole book on the comp. i love turning the pages.

14. i have strong feelings about everything. no matter what they are, this way or that way, they will be strong. i'm very black and white, and i feel that makes me too quick to judge sometimes. i try to keep a hold on this, and talking things out with my husband keeps me more balanced.

15. i like sewing, in theory. i always have needles and threads and all the paraphernalia lying around in my house, no matter where i am, but i never end up actually doing anything about it. ditto sketching.

16. i love gadgets. anything electronic will hold my interest. but once i know everything about them, i get bored and move on. my husband refuses to buy me any more phones. or laptops, or cameras, or... you get the drift.

17. i don't like cooking. as an everyday chore, i mean. i'm not bad at it, i just don't love it.

18. i'm a foodie. i like salads. and steaks. and chocolate. and coffee. and chinese food. and greek food. and spanish food. and turkish food. and i could go on and on. yummmm!

19. i like watching all kinds of movies. except horror. i get so scared by even the most laughable of horror movies that i literally cannot sleep at night. for several nights. apart from that, i love movies and i'll watch anything once.

20. i get very conscious when i use the word 'i' because i read somewhere that the more i's you use in a sentence, the more self-obsessed you are. i've noticed with discomfort that most of the above sentences have started with i. but then, this is a me-me, so i guess it's acceptable.

21. i don't believe there is a god, as in a divine creator of life. i think the natural process in which this world has evolved is much more of a miracle, and i don't want to lessen the play of evolution and survival of the fittest by entrusting it to the random whim of a humanoid divine entity. the current religious polarization of the world scares the bijeezus out of me. but i do believe that there is a core spirit within us that we have to be true to.

22. i believe you can tell a lot about people from who and what they surround themselves with - their friends, their home. i don't believe there will be a particularly nice person with really bitchy friends, ever. or vice versa.

23. i'm very self-conscious and under-confident. being among people who are not my type makes me very uncomfortable.

24. i love traveling. it broadens my horizons.

25. i used to enjoy talking about myself but now i just feel tongue-tied.

PHEW!!! that took me 3 hours!