pippa

sometimes some books can touch you so deeply, like they're written about yourself. the private lives of pippa lee, by rebecca miller. i am filled with emotion, touched to the heart. scared. this life that i am building for myself, sacrificing everything else to be a wife, hoping to be a mother, will i end up being superfluous in the lives of everyone i love and work for? am i really doing this for myself?

blame it on the neighbors

there's been a bomb blast in islamabad today - the marriott hotel lies in ruins, several fatalities. i feel terrible... and guilty. i have always been told that pakistan is behind the terrorism attacking my country, deliberately sabotaging our peace to gain control of our territories, and worse - harboring and even training terrorists and then sending them to our country to kill us. and i'm sure everyone was secretly or not-so-secretly blaming them for the series of blasts hitting india lately. now that there is a bomb blast in their country as well, i don't know what to think. i don't know whether i should call it a cover-up job to convince the west that they're not behind the indian terror attacks, or whether i should empathize since they're in the same situation as us. no matter what it is though, the pakistani person on the street is no better off than the indian person on the street. no matter who wins this war, we lose. our lives, our children, our peace. what is the solution???

under threat

this is a sad day. my country is under repeated attacks from idiots who believe they're achieving something by killing little children. it is hard not to be filled with rage and helplessness. it is hard not to rant on and on about the uselessness and pointlessness of it all. the ones who do it are not listening. will they ever realize that this is not the answer?